Antonio's Story

I'm making this site to try and help others and to help me deal too.  The pain is so fresh in my mind.  For five months I was pregnant and then something horrible happen, my baby was taken away from me.  I'll never know why.  Why did it happen to me? 

  My story starts the end of April 2002,  I took a home pregnancy test and it came back positive.  It was a happy day.  The worst fear that I had was telling my husband that we were going to have another baby.  When I was pregnant we already had four kids, this baby would make five.  We told our other children that they were going to have another sister or brother, they were excited.  Month one came and went everything was fine, as with months two, three and four.  I get to my fifth month and it all went wrong,  I was taken penicillin, which I've taken in the past with out any complications.  On October 4th, 2002. I my face started to swell up and I was having trouble breathing.  I was taken to the hospital and there the doctors said that my baby was ok, They got my breathing under control, and the swelling to subside.  They were going to release me.  I got up to use the bathroom then there was a big burst, so I called the nurse who was standing out side the door, She came in and got me into a wheel chair and took me back to the bed where the doctor did ultrasound after ultrasound,  My baby was still a live.  The doctor at the hospital got a hold of the doctor who was taken care of me during my pregnancy all this doctor said was that I should report to his office the following day at 9:00am, Which I did.  On October 5th, 2002.  There the nurse called me into the room, and the doctor came in. He did not just for my baby's heart beat, what he did was to horrible.  He put my feet in the stir-up's and reached up inside me and started to pull, and pulled and pulled, and he said here is the problem, He got my baby half way out and then told me that I would have to go across the street to the hospital, so he pushed my baby back up inside of me and sent me on my way.  At the hospital, Where I finished delivering my baby by myself.  The nurses at the hospital were nice.  Before I left they pitched in and bought me a little box, which had some pictures of my baby boy, and his little feet and hand prints. On October 5th, 2002.  I left the hospital in a big daze, just holding on too the little box with a few pictures and his feet and hand prints.  Wondering why this all happened to me, and what was I suppose to do now, yes, I have four other kids at home who I had to get up and take care of, but how was I suppose to do this?   When all I wanted to do was have my baby back.  I'm still going though the grief of my loss.  It's been Three years.